He opened not his mouth.

In July 1295, in a parliament at Stirling, King John Balliol of Scotland was ‘given’ a council of twelve advisors with powers to arrange a marriage between Balliol’s son and Jeanne of Valois, niece to Philip IV of France. This was part of the Franco-Scots alliance against Edward I of England. Poor old John played little part in the talks over his own son’s marriage: according to Rishanger, he “opened not his mouth” as the negotiations went ahead.

Meanwhile Philip and his advisors were busy securing diversions from the north and to make alliances in reply to Edward’s alliance with King Adolf of Germany and the princes of the Rhineland. The French were just as concerned to ally with Norway as Scotland: in return for an annual payment of £50,000 sterling, King Eric of Norway promised to equip a fleet of 100 great ships for four months of each year to attack the English. Meanwhile Balliol undertook - or rather, his council undertook - to invade and harry England if Edward left the country or sent large forces to make war on France. Philip undertook to give aid to Scotland in case of need.

All of this had been triggered by Philip’s seizure of the English territories of Gascony and Ponthieu in 1294, via the approved methods of underhand scheming, bare-faced deceit and brute force. Edward’s response in England was to appoint the Bishop of Durham and Earl Warenne as custodians of the north, and Robert de Bruce as castellan of Carlisle. Balliol was ordered to surrender the castles and boroughs of Berwick, Roxburgh and Jedburgh, and on 16 October writs were issued for the seizure of all English lands held by Balliol and his tenants who dwelt in Scotland.

The lights were going out all over Western Europe. In late August Edward had sent reinforcements to defend what remained of English-held Gascony. He received a boost from Henry the Senator, regent of Castile and the brother of Edward’s late queen, Eleanor; Henry offered to send five hundred, a thousand or two thousand knights of Castile to storm across the Pyrenees and attack the French in Gascony.

Therefore, if a prince blew his nose in Berlin, it was heard as far away as Glasgow.