Burn those castles

Between 15-20 July 1298, shortly before the battle of Falkirk, the English army encamped at Kirkliston, just south of the River Forth. This was in order to receive provisions coming upriver from Berwick. At the same time Edward I sent Antony Bek, the fighting Bishop of Durham, and Sir John FitzMarmaduke to destroy the castles of Dirleton, Yester and Hailes in east Lothian.

Dirleton Castle

Contrary winds prevented the arrival of supply ships, which mean Bek's men at Dirleton were reduced to scratching about in nearby beanfields. FitzMarmaduke was sent back to the king to explain the difficulty. What followed is one of the more entertaining exchanges of dialogue from the era.

FitzM: How are we to do this thing, lord king, since it is so very difficult?

Edward: You will do it because I say you will do it. You are an unpleasant man. I have often had to rebuke you for being too cruel, and taking too much pleasure in the destruction of your enemies. Now I say, be off, work all your dreadfulness, and I shall not blame but praise you. Take care I don't see your face again until those castles are burnt.

Sadly, it is quite possible that this convo was invented by the Yorkshire-based chronicler, Walter of Guisborough. What is certain is that the supply ships eventually arrived and the English were able to take the three castles.